Restricted relations

It’s been the month of December when cold winds starts striking my face. I was been in utterly dejection and was facing a tough time. For me the world was comprises of only two things troubles and loneliness. I have made my mind to live in this manner for the rest of my life and hence now I was planning to fix my financial worries. Before I actually can implement the plans I met someone who completely changes my goals. No, I haven’t found my soul mate or a good friend. I just find my old diary.

It was recalling 2010, and as I was having the habit to pen down my thoughts on the dairy, I used to have it. Though I never read my previous diaries but don’t know why I started reading it. After reading 20 or 30 pages, I realized that I was doing a strange thing i.e. restricting the relationship. As I was constantly trying to grab the attention of my near and dears, many times I felt dejected and this habit of mine is actually causing pain.

Hence, I started restricting myself from expressing emotions which even put me out of their eyes. Now, I am the the one who have a paper family with few friends and broken heart. Is it because I restricted the relationship? I decide to find out the answer and started process. I was clueless and hence I wasn’t afraid of getting lost. After spending few nights in thinking about the topic and reading some heavy psychological works, I finally come to conclude that I do not restrict relationships; I restrict myself from the relationship.

Just to avoid the pain, most of us do it and this practice actually restraining us from being satisfied. We forget that we are with someone just because we want to be with them. It is not necessary that others will also feel the same. All we can do is to create the limits in which they feel comfortable. Love and affection is not the thing which you expects in return, and in fact if you are expecting it back then you are putting yourself in misery. My only suggestion to all the readers is please Love without expecting it back and if you are finding it hard to do so then try to find happiness lies in the eyes of someone special.

Do not restrict the relations else will end soon and you will only get tears in your eyes. 

Mistakes which are still to be made

Many times we are suffered because of mistakes and rightly so if we commit mistakes we must pay for it. But there are incidents occur in our life when we pay for the mistakes of the others. Apart from you everyone else is other, no matter it’s your loved ones or a stranger all are others. In fact loved ones are those whom you know personally and have a good info about their life status. From past few days I am experiencing an awkward thing where I am paying for a mistake which is not even committed. Yes, it sounds weird but its true.

Most of us spent our entire life in search for the reason of our pains and we finally come to only conclusion i.e. it is because of destiny. Destiny takes us to pain and we start cursing them. More or less we cannot do anything to avoid this pain. I am not the spiritual instructor or an enlighten expert I am just a normal human being and hence I am experiencing the same. I have no words nor do I have the reason why this is happening. I know only one thing that if pain is not the result of my mistake and hence I don’t have to do anything. Sitting alone in the room with eyes full of tears is not the way to go. Sitting alone and let the notion passed is the only way which we should implement. If you are facing this problem then please do not let notions to drive you. Just allow them to pass over to you. You will be filled by strange agony and you will feel like crying but rather than doing what notions wants to do we can allow it to pass without affecting you. Sadly, if you are facing the problem I have no sympathetic words for you as sympathy is for those pains which you invite and I am sure you are not weak and seeking for sympathy. So allow it to pass and wait for the sunshine. It will add new substance in you i.e. self-control and patience.

Being Another

Every day we meet new peoples, see new things, experience new sensation and every night our thirst of being someone increased. Its human tendency to get impressed by other’s quality and often we overlooked our own qualities. Long ago I met a boy who just entered in his teen age and wants to become a Tennis player. He was so impressed by Boris Becker that he changes his style even his way of holding the racket. He was a good player but his thirst ruined his game. From that day to now I met so many people wanting to be someone and they lose their own identity. To now I met so many people wanting to be someone and they lose their own identity.

Having obsession is one thing but betting your identity to become someone is still out of my thinking limit. There are numerous of clones available in this world and from inside everyone wants to be someone. ‘Another’ resides in us and when another person grows inside you it tends to come out.